Is Self-care selfish?
Parents tend to teach their children to be kind, emphase the importance of sharing and also put other’s needs before theirs. Generally, young children exhibit self-centered behaviors that are usually considered as selfish.
However, if parents, along with the social graces, also show them that taking care of oneself and putting one’s own needs ahead too, is not selfish (Glazer & Clark-Foster, 2019), it would make a huge difference in people’s lives.
One of the most common myths about self-care is the belief that prioritizing one’s own needs is selfish. There is a widespread fear among people that if they look out for themselves, it drives them off their responsibilities.
However, do you know whats interesting? A study mentioned that, if a person engages in self-care, they become more capable in taking care of others, therefore, it is interdependent in nature (Parker-Pope, 2021).
Self-care means that a person prioritises their own well-being particular during stressful situations.
Self-care is the practice we engage in, to nurture our physical, mental and emotional health (American Psychological Association, 2023). It is a continuous process. Self-care helps in:
Thus, the significance of self-care lies in not just pampering oneself, it focuses more on enhancing one’s overall quality of life by taking some pro-active steps.
Dimensions of self-care
Self-care has five dimensions, these are dynamic in nature and this helps to indulge self-care more practically.
Physical self-care
Physical care means enganing in activities that promotes overall wellbeing of a person. The following will help in maintaining good physical health.
Emotional self-care
Emotional health is built one needs to engage in activities that support positive mindset. This requires to be in charge of our emotions and not the vice versa, have the ability to feel and process our feelings and treat oneself with kindness, mindfulness and acceptance, which in turn will help in developing positive emotional self-care.
Mental self-care
Mental self-care is keeping the mind at work by stimulating it through activities that encourage knowledge and continual learning. Below are ways of incorporating mental self-care:
- Reading books
- Learning a new skill
- Practicing meditation.
- Emotional regulation
- Maintaining boundaries
Social self-care
Social self care is focusing on those connections that one makes with people throughout their lives. Limiting boundaries with the ones that are toxic and maintaining meaningful relationships with loved ones is vital for emotional support and helps in building a sense of belonging.
Spiritual self-care
This involves services that offers individuals to connect with something that is greater than themselves which in turn helps them to get connected with their spiritual life. This can come from religion, nature or personal reflection. Examples of this may include, attending prayers at worship places or house, practicing yoga or meditation or just simply spending time in nature.
Benefits of self-care
Improve physical health
According to Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the choices that a person makes every day directly have an impact on one’s health and choosing a good life style by prioritizing self-care will result in better health outcomes (CDC, 2021).
For example, occupying oneself in regular physical activity, eating healthy and getting proper sleep will contribute to improved and good physical health and can avoid risks of diabetes, cancers and heart diseases.
Strengthen mental health
Research shows that there is a significant drop in the levels of stress and depression and higher quality of life, when a person engages in self-care practices (Ayala, Winseman, Johnsen, Hyancinth & Mason, 2018).
Moreover, these practices help individuals to become resilient, build a healthier and a stronger relationship with themselves, which will allow them to have a positive coping mechanisms in dealing with challenges and setbacks, more effectively.
Enhanced productivity and creativity
People usually believe that looking out for oneself will result in less productivity but in contrary studies reveal that there is an increase in creativity levels in employees and are more productive when they engage in self-care activities or at least take regular breaks (American Psychological Association, 2016).
In addition, a study conducted by Ariga and Lleras (2011) revealed that taking breaks during work helps in restoring mental resources by allowing the mind to recharge . It also increases attention span, improved cognitive function, efficiency of the work and hence, overall productivity.
Thus, these findings suggest that practicing self-care can lead to better performance at work or at home.
Stronger relationships
When we occupy ourselves in self-care activities, it also helps us in improving and building a healthy relationship with others. If we put ourselves first, it helps us to connect with people on a better level and provide them support.
Research shows that, individuals who engage in self-care practices are more likely to maintain healthier boundaries in their personal and professional lives (Rein et al., 2018).
They are comfortable saying no to situations which would drain their time or energy and are able to delegate tasks efficiently. This will result in strengthening the relationships and make it more fulfilling with family, friends, and colleagues.
Embracing self-care should be an important part of our lives. By maintaining it, people can bring positive changes in their mental and physical health, enhance their relationship with others and contribute to overall well-being.
Additionally, we can try to be generous and show compassion to others without negating our own needs, hence, drawing a line between selfishness and selflessness.
We live in a world where people are always caught up in the busyness of life, let’s take a moment to realize and take time to take care for ourselves which is not only beneficial for us but also for those whom we love and care for. To incorporate self-care in our lives, it does not need to be time consuming, difficult or challenging.
Always start with small goals, try and experiment with various practices and it is important to understand what our mind and body needs. Hence, selfishness is not an act of selfishness, moreover placing it as your priority will create a foundation for a healthier and balanced life.